By THLaird Colyne Stewart
Greetings unto all those who may read this missive, from Gonzalo
mjöksiglandi, humble page (of the mixed up lineage) in the court of Their
Majesties of Misrule, Gaerwen and Ulfhedin,
As you may be aware, recently a new land has been discovered
far to the west (or, even farer to the east). It is a land of chocolate,
peppers and gold, of towering pyramids and thick trees. I set sail to this new
land, along with Dan the Dane, my fellow page (half-brother to Dagmar Halvdan),
to wait upon Their Majesties of Misrule.
The winds were gusting up to 70 kilometers per hour on my
voyage. The kilometer is a measurement of speed in this New
World , I am told. In our terms the wind was blowing really, really,
REALLY hard. It actually caught the door to my cabin aboard ship and half
wrenched it from the frame. The boat was in danger of sinking from this storm,
but we landed safely, and my fellow page and I made our way through the
freezing winds and found shelter in a hall. This hall was within the boundaries
of the Barony of Septentria, which was hosting a Twelfth Night celebration.
Over this merriment, our Majesties Misrule were to…well…misrule.
His Majesty was resplendent in fine slit pantaloons, with tiger
print hose, a white blouse and red vest. Upon his head perched a hat (also made
of the skin of a local great cat) around which sat his crown, and from which
sprouted green and white feathers. About his neck hung a necklace of peppers.
Her Majesty was likewise radiant, in Norse garb complete with three sets of
turtle broaches, and strings of pearls, bells, radishes and peppers strung
across her chest. A large helm with mighty horns and thick braids sat atop her
head. In their hands they held their scepters and orbs—sticks of wood, and a
local fruit called a cocoanut.
Before them was spread a table of prizes. For throughout the
day, those assembled would partake in games and challenges for tickets, and
these tickets would then be drawn for these prizes. Beyond the prizes were set
up tables for the general populace to use, and b eside
them were set tables for an A&S show and tell overseen by Lord Berend van
der Eych and Lady Mahault van der Eych. Participants were encouraged to bring
their greatest arts and sciences disaster.
At the end of the hall Lord Rhisiart
ap Meredudd toiled in the bar. Beyond him and unseen were their Excellencies
Septentria, and many other helpers, working in the kitchens. Overseeing all was
Lady Lassarfhina inghean Uilleag,
the event steward.
And yet this was but half the hall! On the other side Lord
Perceval deLaroque and Lady Christiana MacNamara had spread out many tables of
games. In the corner an oasis sprung up, complete with palm trees, drummers and
dancers. One of the dancers looked remarkably like Baroness Alyce de Sheppey.
Dan the Dane, with his roving moustache (which moved all
over his face, and sometimes onto other people’s faces), and I (wearing a
cotehardie, a fez and plaid pants, with a dream catcher and an Aztec solar
calendar hanging from my belt) sometimes helped out Their Majesties throughout
the day, when and if we felt like it. For a time I had to flee for my life, as
several local children (armed children!) thought I was a pirate, simply because
I said I was. Luckily Berend slipped me an eye patch, which I held up to other
people’s faces to send the children off after them.
Their Majesties appointed Lord William the Younger as the
Captain of Their army on the merit of his silly walk. To decide upon their
admiral, a group of sea-dogs came before them blustering and yelling, until
Berend leapt upon the stage, kissed Her Majesty and stole the admiral’s hat.
Not to be out done, Lady Rusalka of the Galbraiths kissed His Majesty, then Her
Majesty, leaving Berend no choice but to kiss His Majesty. Both Berend and
Rusalka were then appointed co-admirals.
In all the amorous campaigning, His Majesty’s chapeau was
knocked to the ground, and though I managed to rescue the crown itself, the feathers
were snatched b y a self proclaimed
enemy of the crown, dressed as a young Duke Hasdrubal. His Majesty appointed
William to recruit a brute squad to retrieve the feathers. While he was doing
so, the thief strode cockily before the thrones, wearing the feathers in her
coronet. William snuck up behind her and plucked the feathers, whereupon she
called for her own brute squad. It seemed the enemies of the crown outsized the
loyal brute squad of Their Majesties, who scattered to the winds. Lords Petrus
and Grimroth then abducted His Majesty, throne and all. Eventually His Majesty
returned, but as I was one of those who scattered, I am not sure what he had to
do to secure his release.
Tickets were handed out to people for passing potatoes
between themselves, using only their elbows, chins and knees. Touching one with
your hands meant you had to partake of the poor man’s lutefisk (sardines).
Tickets were also awarded for eating the peppers on Their Majesties necklaces.
The members of Petrea Thule practiced at Glic in a back
corner, preparing themselves for a Glic challenge at Snowed Inn in two weeks
time.
A court was held where awards were handed out, but I do not
know who won them, for I had b een
dragged into a game of Tablero with Baroness Adrielle Kerrec, who had just
trounced Lord Rattanicus . When
Adrielle had to step out, Baron Konrad Mattias Jaeger continued for her and we
played until we were both well sauced.
Feast, with an Old World
/ New World theme was then served. The Spanish
Remove: consisted of Olive and b read,
Fava beans with serano ham, Chorizo empanadillas, Eggplant casserole, Venetian
xinxanella, Roast pork with sweet and sour sauce and Fruit empanadas. The Mexican
Remove consisted of: champurrado (chocolate drink), Tortilla chips with salsa,
guacamole and frizoles, Prawns with pumpkin seed sauce, Potatoes with walnuts
and eggs, Tamales with boar, Mole de polbano and Chocolates.
Two of the dishes were
served from the deck of a large boat that was wheeled about the room on a
trolley. Pirates from Ardchreag tried to raid the vessel, but it was under Her
Highness Ealdormere’s protection, so the raid failed. Instead, they captured a
smaller craft made of bread and manned b y
bears made of butter, and sailed past head table where His Excellency Septentria
stood in his ocelot skin great kit and was showered with volley after volley of
bread b alls. Oh, if only His
Excellency had more ships of his own to protect him!
After feast, Lassarfhina
and Rhisart brought out a birthday cake for Gaerwen and Lady Þorfinna gráfeldr,
which was cut up and shared with all still present in the hall.
The hall slowly emptied after that, as folk made their way
for home. For those that remained a cloven Clementine made the rounds.
It was truly a fun day, with much merriment (more than one
man distracted b y tablero could
possibly record).
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